Why I wear black clothing

A Facebook friend astonished me last week by complaining about other women wearing black clothing.

“Are we all Italian grandmother widows?” she asked. “No! Then why do people dress that way?”

Here is my very simple answer: It saves time. It makes it easier to put together outfits and get dressed in the morning. All my jewelry coordinates with my black-and-denim wardrobe. It makes it easy to pack for travel. Black doesn’t show the dirt, so less there’s cleaning and no panic attacks about coffee or spaghetti “ruining” a white blouse.

But, most of all, wearing black clothing saves me time because I don’t have to respond to the questions I get when I wear colors (especially those “cheery” pastels). Questions like:

“You look so tired honey, are you getting enough sleep?”

“Have you put on weight?” Followed by “Hey, I know this great gluten-free, lactose-free, flavor-free diet you should try!”

“You don’t look well. Is there, er, something I should know?”

I look good in black. This is not a crime! And for some inexplicable reason, I prefer hearing comments like “Nice dress!” “Are you going out some where?” and “Wow, elegant.” Which are the comments I get when I wear black, dark greys, and dark blues. The black clothing looks great with expensive jewelry, and also great with casual denim jeans. So I’m set, wherever I’m going.

And, no, I don’t dress like an Italian grandmother. In the words of columnist Kathy Pollitt, the correct term for this look is “Hot Sicilian Widow.” So much nicer.

 

 

 

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